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Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Intertwined

I left.
Because you told me to.
(Or, at least, I tried.)
Not realizing just how securely my hands were tied.
Bounded so tightly, my wrists damn nearly rubbed raw nightly,
Rope burns morphing into scars,
Bittersweet erupting in my mouth every time I'd stare at the stars.
Damn, look at those stars…..
Look how they shine for you…………….

Pay me no mind, man…..
I am so far gone, trapped in another dimension,
Shaken and stirred, warped, beyond distention.
You see, I loved you, and everything about you,
The physical…..The way you made me giggle,
That sweet smile…..Damn, I was so beguiled.
You made me feel sexy and so full of anticipation,
And now what?
I’m left here with these remnants of you,
And your echoed pleas for emancipation.

I was that “funky virus” that quickly seeped into your core,
Left you feeling empty and lovesick, yet I know your ass wanted more.
You wanted me to weaken your immunity,
Wanted me as your soon-to-be:
Wife.
Baby-mama.
Best friend.
Lover.

But instead, you chose another:
Another path,
Another life,
Another lover,
Another wife.


Shit. I guess I’ll see you next lifetime.

It’s okay to change your mind, to press Rewind,
Go back in time, and look for something else.
Yep, that’s fine.
Perfectly fine.
But fuck your calendar analysis, that it was just mere months
(Love is timeless, don’t you know?)
Logic distorted your brain and put up this protective front.
See, you couldn’t deal with seeing me leave,
Tried to cover up that vulnerable heart you wear right here on your sleeve.
Told yourself you didn’t want me,
But did you REALLY believe
that bullshit?


Because I didn't.

But okay-- because you told me to, I’ll go….But in the meantime, I hope you remember the way I made you moan,
The way you’d smile when my face popped up on your phone.
And that feverish adolescent aching for one another,
Remember that intoxicating night we connected as lovers?
Or the way we’d spit hot fire?
Hot rhymes bouncing back and forth; man, you were such a liar,
‘Cause you know my shit was tight, yo!

I hope you remember the Black Hole Sun,
Or the moment when you knew deep down to your infected core that I was “The One.”
(Stop comparing, man; 'cause you ain't never find another woman like me).
Telling me to go, so coldly, surprisingly boldly,
Was exactly what I needed to hear.
'Cause a bitch shouldn’t have to linger year after year,
Chasin’, anticipatin’, hopin’ and expectin’,
Analyzing every sentence, with a knife, dissecting
Every action, every line, every word,
But when you told me to go this time, I believed you.

I heard.

And what I learned
Is that it doesn’t matter how one feels,
It matters what one does.
Your world turns on logic and fact,
And mine, emotions and love.
And although the space between is vast in time,
Come on, baby--we both know that we'll forever be intertwined.
February 2011

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